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some personal space

we all need personal space, right? Continue reading some personal space

Lindsay MarieJune 1, 2018July 8, 2018Leave a comment

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About a week after my last post, I received some devastating news. Soul-crushing, heart-breaking, mind-debilitating information that has thrown me into a dark space. I feel the anxiety and depression from 2017 slowly creeping back in. It feels like PTSD....emotions and darkness I recognize but not in a comforting familiar way. More in a this-beast-almost-got-you-before-now-run-like-hell. My fight/flight response and area of my brain is activated and I can’t get out of that place in my head. • This quote is where my anger in all of this stems from. Why are there people that don’t see life this way? Why is there so much trauma in the world and hurting people that we are drawn to create drama and discord? Why aren’t we only focused on love and peace and running like hell to chase our dreams? • Some would say that is a privileged statement... that many folks are so distracted and overcome by putting food on the table for their children and working to make sure they have another paycheck coming. And that’s true. But everyone has dreams. And everyone can take tiny baby steps to chase them, no matter where we are. • All I want to focus on in this life is loving my girls and chasing my dreams while supporting them to chase their own. Showing up for them emotionally so that they know they are loved unconditionally. I fail at that often ...and when I do, I know it. And then I feel worse. Anxiety and depression don’t bode well for endless energy and unconditional love for small humans who require so much attention and emotional energy to keep them regulated. It’s so very hard to pour from an empty cup. • I am working towards getting myself to a place where my cup is full and I can show up every day for these precious souls who have chosen me. They not only need that, they deserve that. And in doing so, all four of us will run like we are on fire towards our wildest dreams. ✨ . . . . #wildestdreams #thislife #threetinygirls #love #motherhood #honestmotherhood #anxietyanddepression #dreamup #choosewisely #trauma #traumainformed #whiskeywineandsunshine

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